Monday, December 26, 2005

Less than zero

I am just bearing it. I rise, I live, I sleep. When I find no joy, I grit my teeth and bear it.

I'm not hot. I'm not cold. I'm just warm, the warm blood pushed round and round, the whole of me numb and untouchable.

Sometimes I am so lonesome I could cry. But mostly I just hate them all and I'm glad they are not touching me.

I can feel the days ticking away. How many will I have? More than Alexander. More than Keats. Less than zero.

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