Sunday, January 30, 2011

You are wrong about me

You were wrong about me. I cannot say how but I know you were. Sometimes I feel like I have to believe that or I will dissolve and sometimes I just believe it.

I made my money this month. I felt the fear and I withstood it. I won my money back because I'm good enough at it to do that, and I made some dollars from coaching and made my money. I keep turning up. You think I wasn't worth anything and however little I am worth, I keep turning up.

You were wrong about me because you misunderstood who I am. I am humble and I don't think that's a sin. You think you should have pride when there's nothing to be proud of. You think the abstract means more than who we really are, and I never will. I never will, and I have to be happy with that.

You were wrong about me. I am happy with who you are because I'm adaptable. I'll take goodness from wherever I find it and make what I can of it. You think that goodness is not enough, that it's not worth nurturing. You're wrong. I'm not ever changing my mind about this. You're wrong and I don't have to share your belief that people are not worthwhile.

You are wrong about me because I'm trying. I'm willing to fail and I do, God knows I do. You should have loved me. If you had, you would have had everything you wanted. I'm like that. I'm like a well you could have drawn water from if you only knew how. You think there's a secret; there isn't. You are wrong about that too.


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