Sunday, July 13, 2008

Reasons you are not likeable today

1. You used all my razors and didn't replace them. Again. And instead of being sorry, and trying to make up for it by getting some more, your attitude is, as usual, tough shit.
2. You asked me whether I wanted anything from the shop and did not buy the thing I asked for. It feels like you purposely didn't in the hope that I would say something and you could start a fight over it, but really it's just that you are so inconsiderate.
3. I am not going to beg you any more to give me back my cash card. I am convinced you keep it like that so that I'll get angry and then you can make out that it's unreasonable. It's not. It's reasonable to be angry that someone will not give you back your access to your money and makes you beg over and over to have it. I asked you to put it back in my wallet when you were done with it, but for some reason, you feel that it is a terrible imposition. You prefer that I stew over it, knowing that I can't stand things being put off like that. It's impossible to believe you do not do it on purpose when you do it so often, never making any attempt to change your behaviour, and what's worse, getting a bitchy attitude whenever I suggest that you do the right thing.
4. You do not give a shit about important things, but you care about small stuff that is not important. What's worse, you bully me and the kids over it. You seriously need to get some fucking perspective.
5. You are so unwilling to communicate like an adult that I truly believe it is better for me to post this on my blog, so that strangers read how I feel about you, than it ever would be to send you this email.
6. Most important, you do not care that you're not likeable. You think it's my fault for not liking you. But actually, I'm trying to. That's how hard you are making it, because I am trying really hard.

14 Comments:

At 9:22 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fucking hilarious, Dave whats the matter can't take a hint?

 
At 9:29 pm, Blogger $Zero said...

1. You used all my razors and didn't replace them.

...

2. You asked me whether I wanted anything from the shop and did not buy the thing I asked for.

...

3. I am not going to beg you any more to give me back my cash card.


and voila:

4. You do not give a shit about important things, but you care about small stuff that is not important.


definitely worthy of a syndicated column.

 
At 8:42 am, Blogger P. said...

Zero, dood, there has to be more to life than whining on Zen's comments. Or perhaps not in your case. And you, Grant, you nobhole. It's the guy's outlet - at least it's honest... and you can always fuck off if you don't like it, as I'm sure the man himself would say.

 
At 11:01 am, Blogger Dr Zen said...

zero, as so often the point whooshes by you. These are things that are unlikeable today, not things that I dwell on.

Gunt, I'm perfectly happy to be considered a sad sack, because I can revel in the knowledge that there are others so much sadder that they hang on every word of a sad sack like me.

P, one notes that Gunt has not had the balls to write a blog. He's also not smart enough to realise that if I cared, I would be hiding.

 
At 11:24 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Gunt has not had the balls to write a blog. He's also not smart enough to realise that if I cared, I would be hiding.

Balls have nothing to do with it, but the ability to write coherently does.
You care enough to regularly delete my comments.

 
At 11:26 am, Blogger Dr Zen said...

You could do a podcast. Given that you're Mr Personality, it should be a doddle for you.

I delete your comments when they fall foul of the comment policy of this blog, that's all.

 
At 11:32 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You could do a podcast. Given that you're Mr Personality, it should be a doddle for you.

Do i detect a hint of bitterness LMFAO

I delete your comments when they fall foul of the comment policy of this blog, that's all.

Like demonstrating your hypocrisy and how you contradict yourself?

 
At 12:22 pm, Blogger Dr Zen said...

Yes, I'm bitter because I don't share your outstanding social skills. Luckily, I have more hair.

And dude, all you ever demonstrate is what a twat you are. So long as you do it within the bounds of the comment policy of this blog, you are free to continue.

 
At 12:46 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 12:48 pm, Blogger Dr Zen said...

I am not going to indulge you in a pissing match over social skills. There's a huge gulf between not liking the people you live with and their knowing it though. You may not be capable of living with nuance, Gunt, but I'm fucked if I'm going to waste hours of my life being trolled because of that.

 
At 6:25 pm, Blogger $Zero said...

whooshed? yikes. not at all.

it could very easily be argued that being considerate and thoughtful to your spouse is one of the most important things there is, no matter how minor the issue.

i was simply noting the amusing irony in your list, echoing your own advice back to you in what i thought was an amusing summary that you would appreciate.

i didn't even use this beaut from item 4 on your list:

You seriously need to get some fucking perspective.

heh.

anyone who regularly reads your blog knows full well what an amazingly beautiful, thoughtful, and considerate person you are.

(most of the time, anyway -- and when you're not, the bastards usually deserve it)

you inspire us all to be better people. you regularly raise the bar.

although, sometimes you DO take yourself a bit too seriously, that's just part of your nature and it's some of what many of us love about you.

perhaps i should have been more considerate of your bad mood there, and for that i sincerely apologize.

i was just trying to lighten things up.

i know it's futile to attempt such magic at times, but my own smartassed nature is quite the unruly horse to steer.

especially when there's such primo ball-breaking material up for grabs.

merci beaucoup.

 
At 11:48 pm, Blogger P. said...

Zero, sir...

i was just trying to lighten things up.

Dood, you don't go to a fucking funeral to lighten it up. Well, unless you're some relative of Hunter S himself. Actually, ignore that completely. Funerals are the perfect place to go to lighten things up.

And, with that, please accept my apology for being petty.

And Zen, your blog's not a funeral - said for the humour value only, even if it was only mine. Zero hit the nail on the head with, "you inspire us all to be better people. you regularly raise the bar."

 
At 3:27 am, Blogger $Zero said...

And, with that, please accept my apology for being petty.

absolutely not.

 
At 4:01 am, Blogger P. said...

You'll be made welcome at my funeral. Thank you.

 

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